The Archer Who Stopped Apologizing

July 20, 20263 min read
the archer who stopped apologizing

Seren came back to the clearing at dusk, when the light was the color of weak tea and the birds had gone quiet the way they do before rain that never arrives.

Avalon knew her step before she saw her but it was wrong. Not louder or smaller but a woman walking like she was trying to leave no mark on the ground at all.

She did not carry her bow.

"You didn't come to train," Avalon said. It wasn’t a question.

"No." Seren stopped at the tree line, hands empty, shoulders folded in on themselves like a letter someone had decided not to send. "I came because I don't know how to do the thing everyone says is simple. I don't know how to say no without becoming someone they resent."

Avalon didn’t answer. She had learned, a long time ago, that the fastest way to lose a true thing was to say it too soon.

She tilted her head instead, toward the far side of the clearing, where a doe had been grazing since the light first turned gold. The animal lifted her head once, measuring the distance between herself and the two women, then lowered it again and went on eating.

"She's been coming for weeks," Avalon said. "Watch her."

Seren watched. The doe never came closer than the length of three arrows. Never further than the reach of Avalon's voice, if Avalon chose to use it. She grazed at exactly the distance that let her remain a wild thing and still be, in her own way, near.

"She doesn't apologize for the distance," Avalon said. "She doesn't creep in to prove she's grateful for the grass. And she doesn't bolt every time something moves at the edge of the trees. She just stays her own shape. That's all a boundary is, Seren. Not a wall. A shape that doesn't change to make someone else comfortable."

"But what if they leave? What if I hold my shape and everyone walks away from it?"

"Then they were never drawn to you," Avalon said. "They were drawn to the bending."

The wind moved through the clearing then, and for a moment the doe's ears turned toward the tree line, toward the place where something had been standing, still and unnamed, for longer than either of them had spoken of it aloud.

Seren felt it too. She always had. She had simply never asked, and Avalon had never told her there was anything to ask.

This time, Avalon looked toward the trees. Not startled or guarded but the way a woman looks toward a door she has decided, finally, not to keep shut.

"You feel it," she said. It was not a question either.

"I've felt it since the beginning." Seren's voice had gone very quiet. "I never said anything. I didn't want to seem…"

"Difficult." Avalon almost smiled. "I know the feeling."

She didn’t explain what waited at the tree line. She didn’t soften it into something small enough to be comfortable and she did not pretend it wasn't there. She simply let it be exactly what it was: present, patient, not yet ready to be known.

"Ask it yourself," Avalon said, "when it's ready to answer."

Seren didn’t ask again. She stood instead, the way the doe stood, close enough to what she trusted yet far enough to remain entirely her own, and for the first time in a long while, nothing in her strained to be anywhere else.

The mist didn’t lift, it didn't need to. Something had already been named, even without a name.

the avalon chronicles

She didn't build a wall. She simply stopped bending her own shape to keep others comfortable. What would your boundaries look like if they came from knowing instead of fear?

avalon chroniclesthe avalon chroniclesfeminine leadership fablewomen's wisdom storiesboundaries without guilt
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